|
|
|
There’s a habit I see constantly in intelligent, capable people: |
They explain themselves too much. |
You’ve seen them do it (and maybe you’ve even done it yourself). It looks like this… |
They explain why they made the decision. |
Why they couldn’t make the meeting. |
Why they said no. |
Why they charged what they charged. |
Why they believe what they believe. |
Why they deserve to be in the room. |
And, without realizing it…they slowly give away their authority. |
The most influential people I’ve met tend to communicate differently. |
They’re clear. |
They’re respectful. |
But, they don’t feel compelled to convince everyone that their choices are justified. |
There’s a subtle psychological reason for this: |
When you over-explain a decision, you can accidentally signal that you’re asking the other person to approve of it. |
Think about the difference between: |
“I won’t be able to attend.” |
and: |
“I’m really sorry, I’ve just had such a crazy week and I have another commitment that I made a while ago, and I tried moving some things around but unfortunately I don’t think I’m going to be able to make it…” |
The second version might feel more polite. |
But, the first often feels more grounded. Certain. |
It’s important to realize that this doesn’t mean becoming cold, arrogant, or dismissive… |
It means recognizing that confidence frequently sounds simpler than insecurity. |
A clear “no” doesn’t require an essay. |
A boundary doesn’t require a closing argument. |
A decision doesn’t always require unanimous approval. |
And your expertise doesn’t need to be repeatedly announced if your actions demonstrate it. |
The next time you find yourself writing a long explanation for a simple decision, stop for a second. |
Ask yourself: |
Am I providing useful context…or am I trying to earn permission? |
There’s a big difference. |
The strongest presence often comes from someone who can communicate what needs to be said… |
…and then stop talking. |
Your coach, |
- James Michael Sama |
P.S.: If you’re looking for a private advisor to help you develop these qualities, let’s talk. |
|
|
No comments:
Post a Comment